Today is one of those days. I've been sick for nearly a week now with ear infections and I'm assuming, a sinus infection (since my face and my jaw hurt, too). I have a couple decisions I need to make today. They seem simple, but in my compromised health, they may be requiring more of me than I have to offer. So I'm seeking your input :)
I'm sick of being sick, and tired of being in bed. While I could easily spend today in the bed, where I've been for three days now, part of me can't help but wonder, is that what I really want to do? I am tempted to get a shower, throw some make-up on and my fave pair of jeans, and actually be productive, and pretend I don't feel like crud. But, that honestly sounds exhausting. I realize this decision is completely up to me, but I guess I wanted to share my dilemma. LOL
I have two other decisions to make also, these regarding my freedom from food addiction. First, today is technically a liquid day. Should I resume my fasting schedule today, despite not feeling good? This one is not as hard for me to decide, because a liquid day allows for lots of soup and, of course, liquids, so it wouldn't be unsafe even though I'm sick. I will probably make today a liquid day and resume my fasting schedule.
The next question is not so easy though. How about my "freedom days?" I've been in such a blur of half-sleep and cough syrup the last four days, my eating has been anything but normal. My tastebuds are iffy at best, I've eaten sherbet for breakfast, and I've skipped meals. I don't think I have overeaten, but I can't be sure. I can think of a couple deliberate victories, though, like when my husband offered me a second peanut butter cup and I turned it down. So do the last couple days count? I'm always hardest on myself and like most of us, I'm definitely my own worst critic, so I'm inclined to start over today at Day #1. I just want my "count" to be an accurate reflection of my freedom, both for myself, and for each of you. Perhaps I should ask my husband. He would have a good perspective because he has seen everything I've eaten, and I know he'll be honest with me. He's so good like that.
So, I'll definitely have to make the first two decisions on my own, but as for the third question, what do you think? Should today be Day #1 or Day #6. Be honest with me. How would you make the decision for yourself?
I forgot to mention also that I haven't done my online Bible study in almost a week either. I will resume that today also, as satan would love nothing more than my health to become a stumbling block in my freedom. James 1:12 says "Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him." I will persevere, and I pray you will, too.
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